You know that old saying, “is the glass half full or half empty?” Well, it’s really all in the eye of the beholder. And life is so much more pleasant if you see the fullness rather than the emptiness. Sometimes my job entails helping people see that the glass is half full rather than half empty, and the past few weeks this has become a theme in my sessions.

Music is a huge tool in reframing a situation. For example, a woman I worked with was sad in anticipation of the anniversary of her husbands death last year. She was very focused on how much she missed him and how empty it feels now to have him gone. While it’s important to listen and validate these feelings it’s also important to help her focus on something more positive. I firmly believe that what you focus on expands. I asked her why she missed him so much and she began talking about their life together. She talked about his fun-loving spirit, their home, and their favorite activities. One of these activities was dancing. When I played some music she remembered dancing to with him she smiled and moved slightly to the beat. She began talking about the good times they had together.

With a little validation and a little music, my client was now focused on gratitude. She was grateful for the life they shared. We developed a plan on how she could celebrate her husband on the anniversary of his death, recognizing that she may feel sad, but that she was also happy to have shared her life with him and grateful for their relationship. This woman, thinking about her wonderful life with her dearly departed husband, will be a happier woman than one thinking about how awful and painful it is that he is no longer physically with her.

And I was grateful to be a vehicle for that transformation.